f**k

I did not know that the day after a snowy day was a day to avoid riding buses & trains.

I waited for the bus in the morning. I felt good. I had good breakfast. I was ready for the day.

The bus came 10 minutes later and 

as it it were teasing me, 

it passed right by me.

It was packed.

Then the second bus came, 15 minutes later. It was packed.

I didn't have any other choice than pushing myself into the packed bus.

There was a guy standing right in front of me. He was shorter than me and maybe for that reason

I felt even more uncomfortable.

I got off the bus.

I then went down to take take Blueline to school.

10 minutes later, the train came, packed. The door opened and there were these people

standing, starring at me, silently saying, " Don't you dare!"

I let that one pass.

I looked at my watch and I was very likely to be around 10 minute late for the class.

The second train came 15 minutes later, packed with people.

I tried to step in but the door closed right at my nose.

" FUCK!"

To my surprise, I said this dreadful word like more than I had ever said in my entire life.

I don't swear.

I mean, I occasionally say the S word when I bang my head or my foot.  But I don't swear.

And I said F-U-C-K this morning, in front of many many people.

When I had to let the third train pass me, I was about to throw a tantrum.

" F, F, F, F, F!"

I couldn't believe it.

I felt mortified for swearing so much in my life.

But I was even more embarrassed to be so late for the class.

I am a girl who swears now. I am very sad..